Sinking in a feeling I cannot resolve
I sit staring at the one thing that I broke
Wondering if maybe I can put it back together
The way it was before I made such a terrible mistake.
My life carries a burden
That I’ve handed over to someone greater than me
It is almost like a torch that lit an angry path
That I seem to uninterested in traversing just now.
For the love of everything holy
I commit my life to the one that will save me
The only one that I know I can trust completely
With no room for the fault within my temple.
I came to him crying once and he said he loved me
I screamed at him that if he loved me so much why did he allow me to be broken?
He sat quietly and unassuming, his arms resting in his lap
Told me that had I not gone through those things, would I be who I am today?
“If I lavished you with silken robes
Would you understand a woman that came to you raped?
Would you understand her pain and anger?
Or would you simply hand her a robe?”
“If I had you only walk on paths of gold
Would you understand the man with splinters in his feet?
Would you understand his pain the path he took caused him
Or would you simply tell him he needed to walk on gold?”
There are moments of my life I cannot recall
Much of my childhood is gone to black
But I remember being hated all my life
For being born to the wrong two people.
“If I had made you born by Kings and Queens
Would you ever relate to the pauper and the maid?
You are chosen to be stronger than the battle
To be more than what you went through
To be a pillar of light to those that are just now
Going down the path you have traversed.”
I may not ever understand my journey
But I forgive those that hurt me in the name of my God
In the name of being stronger and holier than they could ever dream
In having a God that had enough faith in me
That he knew I would not only perservere
But that I would happily champion this cause
So no woman
Ever felt alone