I Wonder

He told me to stand facing myself

The look I shot him rang viciously through the air;

I watched it bounce around

Then land on the ground.

This is a place

Where one can wish for silence

Then wait for it for ages.

 

The mirror reflected my insecurities;

I never realized how terrible I really thought I was.

I’ve joked about people jumping back when they saw me

Or remembered the rude comment

Of one person

Instead of the hundreds of compliments.

When I turn around my actual reflection

Is so much different than what I think of myself.

 

Then there are the voices

The ones that tell me I’m not good enough

I’m too fat

Too lazy

Too stupid

To do, or be anything.

Then the voices I’ve ignored

The ones telling me the opposite

Of every voice I let take up space in my head.

 

There are people in this world

Thinking there is nothing wrong with them’

Yet everything is.

Then there are people in this world

That think everything is wrong with them;

Nearly nothing is.

 

When I step out of the building

Begin carrying on with life

I wonder

How many great things I’ve said

To people that deserved it

They never heard?